The Pass-Out Trilogy Part 1: You're Never Fully Dressed Without a (Grey) Smile

Before I start this story I just want to say that I have been over the top excited to post this story in particular on here. This is partly because it's not only one of my favorite ones to tell, but also because I feel that this story starts off a streak of the most awkward/embarrassing things that have ever happened to me. So, if the past few stories have been boring you, perk up friends, because this is about to get real.

This story is also from summer 2008, just after my freshman year of high school had finished. My friend Errin (yes, the one from the post "Not So Good AIM") was over per usual for a sleepover. It was just like any other sleepover Errin and I had - catching up on life, going in the hot tub, making silly videos... you get the point. It was about 11:00 at night when we decided to have some ice cream. So, we make massive sundaes with all the toppings one could think of and sit down at my kitchen table to eat them. Sounds like fun, right? Well it was. Until about five minutes later.

As we're enjoying our ice cream, Errin begins to tell me a story. Luckily for her, I'm much too nice to tell it on here since it would probably be incredibly awkward for her and the rest of you if I did. So I'll just say this: there was a lot of blood in the story. Now, up until Errin was telling me this story I didn't realize how blood and I did not get along very well whatsoever. At first I was fine, but as she began to go into further detail, I started getting incredibly squeamish - my stomach turned upside down, my head felt light, and my fingers were tingling as if I had stuck them in ice for an hour. The next fifteen seconds or so went like this:

"Errin... I don't feel good."

"Why?"

"Your story is grossing me out you need to stop talking."

"I'm almost done!"

"Nope you have to stop shut up."

"Seriously like two more sentences!"

"Well if you're going to keep going I need to stand up and hold onto..."

BOOM.

As Errin continued her story, I stood up to grab onto the half wall that separates my kitchen from my living room to get a hold of myself. However, before I could even do so, I passed out cold. Now this wasn't a graceful pass out where my head just slumped over while I was sitting - that's what should have happened. But instead, the idiot writing this blog post decided she was going to stand up. So I literally fell flat out, flipping over a kitchen chair (and breaking it in the process), face first on my hardwood kitchen floor.

This part is according to what Errin told me because I was too busy being completely unconscious to know what was going on. Errin freaks out, sprints up the stairs screaming for my mom, who had heard the bang and thought we were just making some stupid video like we always did. She tells my mom I passed out, and as they are both coming back down the stairs, I start waking up.

When I was on my way to being conscious, I cannot tell you how much pain I was in. Since I had fallen flat out, not only my face, but my entire body hurt. I couldn't remember passing out at all, so I thought I was waking up from a nightmare. What was my solution to that? Waking myself up by screaming.

But it wasn't a nightmare. I was totally awake, my face still in the floor, screaming. By this point Errin and my mom were in the kitchen with me and trying to help me up. As I lift my head up, what's on the floor where my face was? Blood. Perfect, the whole reason I passed out in the first place. My teeth had gone through my upper lip, which was now the size of a golf ball. I was then lead to the couch, where I laid down as my mom got me a huge ice pack to put on my face. Meanwhile, my mom is asking me what happened and Errin is giving me the wide-eyed look that translates to "Don't tell her the story." So, I say what I've still said to this day: "She told me a gross story with a lot of blood in it" (you're all so curious right now. I know). As this is happening, Errin is also texting my boyfriend saying, "Molly passed out." His response? "Wake her up."

Aw! I knew there was a reason I broke up with that one.

The next day I woke up and looked in the mirror to see that the swelling had gone down. However, one of my front teeth and the other tooth next to it had turned grey. That's promising!

We called the dentist to learn that the nerves in those two teeth had instantly died on impact, and to replace the nerves I would need two root canals. This happened, but as for the color of my teeth, the dentist could not do anything until I turned eighteen because if he recolored them and my teeth grew, there would be a line separating the two colors. So friends, for the next three years of my life, I looked like this:

CHECK OUT DAT GREY TOOTH.

So once I turned eighteen, those two teeth were shaved down and replaced with two fake teeth that matched the shape and original color of the old ones. So thankfully, after three years of having to answer the question "what happened to your tooth?", my smile was back to normal.

It was also three years of having to learn to be secure despite a physical flaw that took a while getting used to in the mirror. I had to remember even though my mouth was different, my heart wasn't. In 1 Samuel 16:7, God says to Samuel, 

"The Lord does not look at things people look at. People look at outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." 

We live in a society that tells us our thighs are too thick, and that the gap in between them is too thin. That our hair isn't voluminous enough, our legs aren't long enough. Our teeth aren't white enough. But those aren't the things we should be focus on. When we work out at the gym to get fitter bodies, do our hair to make it shinier and softer, and shop for clothes to flatter us, do we ever take a look at what actually matters to God? I know I'm guilty of not doing so. Beauty has been externalized, and it's time we give it the definition God gave it. Beauty is determined not by what we put on ourselves, but what we find within ourselves. God loves your heart just the way he made it - beautifully and wonderfully. A happy heart that chases the Lord is the secret behind the most beautiful people. Let's try to work on those instead.

Until next time, the song of the day! I haven't done a worship song yet, and I think it's about time it is. Here's one of my favorites that gets me choked up nearly every time I listen to it, by a woman with a voice from heaven - "Love Came Down" by Kari Jobe. Listen and bask in the truth that set you free.